https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqAjWUAlJ-0 This song should come with a warning label: Your brain will be taken hostage by the catchy, meaningless chorus of gobbling. Said chorus will kill off any and all profound thoughts you might have during the season of gratitude. Happy Thanksgiving. MTO Horror will be back next week starring 10-year-old Norah Marr.
Tag: Thanksgiving
MTO Mike Friend
An operating room nurse in a Level V trauma hospital, Mike was no stranger to blood. He'd seen hundreds of surgeries, massive burns, stabbings, and gunshot wounds. But no matter how many car accidents got wheeled into the OR, he never got used to the caprice of mass x acceleration in rearranging bones, organs, and …
What We’re All Thankful For
I asked my students to write about something or someone they're thankful for. One thing. But then they asked if they could list more. Of course I told them they could. Olivia Johnson (Age 15): Food and Drinks. I am very thankful to have the ability to eat whenever I want and to drink clean …
Rescue the Table Fancy Like
This Thanksgiving, stop. Halt the cooking, put your flour-dusted, pumpkin-splattered ear up to the knobby pink mountain of meat and listen. When your uncle walks in wearing a Let's Go Brandon shirt and you’re tempted to rip it from his body, bend him over the table, and flay him right there, pause. When they’re late. Again. And …
To You. From the Turkey
This Thanksgiving, stop. Halt the cooking, put your flour-dusted, pumpkin-splattered ear up to the knobby pink mountain of white meat and listen. As you scoop your third helping of baked marshmallows with a dab of sweet potatoes, and your nether regions fuse to the chair, take note. When your uncle walks in wearing a Make …
Thankfulness: Just Do It
Thankful: conscious of a benefit received. I don't love their shoes, but I'd nominate Nike slogan creator Dan Wieden for the Nobel Peace Prize. Just do it--applied en masse could cure obesity, poverty, illiteracy, unemployment, and empty toilet paper rolls. The downside would be impulse marriages, divorces, suicides, and job walk-offs-- impulse suicides notwithstanding, the …
The Thanksgetting Holiday
Abe Lincoln gave us our country, whole and emancipated. He gave us debate (along with Douglas). He gave us a war and saw it through to the end, at which time he decided that some purposeful, focused gratitude was in order. Although Lincoln's religious leanings seem pendulous, his moral compass was true. As his election …
How To Be An Idiot This Thanksgiving
Pass me the sweet potatoes... and the Black Friday Ad. The talk this Thanksgiving is whether or not to shop the Black Friday specials, which have slithered into Thursday, and onto our Thanksgiving table. Passions run high on both sides of the turkey. Some folks can't pass up a deal and will gladly sacrifice dinner …
KL Griffiths 